Embedded in the desire for longevity is the yearning to not part with the people in our lives. As the old Korean proverb says: “A life in a heap of dung is still better than no life at all.” This implies that we are emotionally attached to life, despite the suffering we experience for various reasons.

People tell themselves that they only want to live until their children are married, until they have grandchildren, or just until the grandchildren go to college. Better yet, they say they want to live just long enough to see their grandchildren get married, all in an attempt to postpone the separation from their loved ones.

No matter how hard we try to avoid thinking about death, when we see people close to us die, we can’t help but confront the futility of life and the fear of death. There was a person who witnessed a family member, emaciated after years of illness, failing to swallow even a drop of water. The person wondered: “Does the spirit vanish when the body dies? If everything vanishes into nothingness, what is the point of holding onto life so dearly?” The gradual loss of weight when someone is at the very end of their life is a natural process, and it is not a bad thing. Like an oil lamp that quietly fades away, consuming every bit of your own energy as you pass away could be considered a good death. Additionally, if you can remain lucid until your last breath, that would be even better.